Topic 3 A safe dating culture

Activity 1: Tackling Dating Violence

Dating violence is still a common phenomenon, even nowadays. According to a research recently conducted on Dating Violence Victimization among Adolescents in Europe, “the global prevalence of DV victimization was significantly greater among girls than boys” and “the prevalence of DV in both girls and boys was greater for those over age 15.”

WHO also states that, unfortunately, sexual violence starts early: “1 in 4 young women (aged 15-24 years) who have been in a relationship will have already experienced violence by an intimate partner by the time they reach their mid-twenties.”

It happens so often that almost all girls have heard about it and are in some way afraid of it. In this topic, we would like to explore how we can all help change this situation.

Question: How can boys make clear to girls and other boys that dating and having sex should be safe and comfortable for all partners? Think not only about consent, but also about how you talk with each other about making contact, dating, relationships, and sex in general. 

Activity 2: Whistle

Scenario:

You are chilling with some other boys on the street. A girl passes by and two of your friends start to whistle at her.

Question: What would you do? Would you dare to stop the whistling or say something about it? If you would not do something, what would hold you back?

Activity 3: Peer Pressure

Question: In the “whistle” scenario, there may be “peer pressure” to not do something or even to also start whistling. What type of pressure is that? How are you expected to behave as a boy among boys towards girls? Why?

Try to analyse the peer pressures at work.

Activity 4: A night out

Scenario:

In a club, 5 girls are dancing in a circle, with their bags in the middle. Every now and then, they “secretly” look, but quite obviously, at some boys, who are leaning against the wall of the dancefloor. It looks like they want the boys to come over, and at the same time, as if they want to protect themselves from them.

Question: If you like one of the girls, what would you do? How would you overcome your own shyness? How do you approach the girl? How can you give her the feeling she is not attacked but that she is safe?

Activity 5: Influences I

Question: There is a list of factors that could influence dating culture. Choose the factors which you believe are playing an important part:

Environment (family & friends)
Community (school & neighborhood)
Communication problems
Role models in general
Social media & Media
Gender
Other [please indicate]
Other [please indicate]

Activity 6: Influences II

Question: Many of the mentioned factors that influence dating culture are difficult to change. Can you still think of ways how you can diminish such negative influences?