Topic 2 More than a date
You have dated the girl or boy you are attracted to and are interested in. Or you have been approached by a girl or boy for a date. Dating usually refers to a couple, who wants to go out together regularly. The relationship may become romantic.
Activity 1: Type: Free Text & Discussion
Make a list of activities that you might do together on a date; e.g., go to the movies, watch a DVD, go for a walk, talk on the phone, chat on social media. Share your list with your peers and exchange your views.
The person who becomes your boyfriend or girlfriend may be someone who you already know, but who you want to spend more and more time with. You may feel excited to be with that person and find every opportunity you can to spend time and be alone with them. You may start to feel that you are ‘more than a date’, and maybe you want to tell people that you now have a girlfriend or a boyfriend.
Activity 2: Type: Free Text & Discussion
Did you have a date already? If yes, reflect on your first date. How did you feel? If not, what are your expectations for the first date? What do you expect to happen next?
Now think of some of the other things you might do only with a boyfriend or girlfriend; e.g., romantic walks, holding hands, kissing, touching, sexual activities.
Activity 3: Type: Discussion
Going on a date with someone should feel new and exciting, but also comfortable for both of you. Work as a group to make a checklist of common rules for comfortable dating. Discuss your checklist with others.
Steady relationships usually mean two people spending time together in a close relationship. Stable relationships usually develop over time and may consist of friendship, romantic love and/or intimacy involving sex.
For teens to develop healthy, positive, pleasurable relationships, they need to be able to identify when relationships are unpleasurable or even damaging. Damaging relationships may begin with what seem to be “innocent” issues and can eventually lead to abuse and violence. Many teens settle for relationships that don’t feel good because they find it difficult to communicate their concerns to their partners. We will go into this topic later on.
What type of rules did you consider while making your checklist? What did your peers include in the checklist that you did not? Would you change anything in your checklist?
Here is a possible checklist, with ground rules for comfortable and safe dating: